Sometimes, when things don’t go the way we want, we feel like it’s someone else’s fault. We blame our parents, teachers, friends, spouses, or anyone around us, even our background or upbringing.
That’s normal. Blames are sometimes valid, and it feels easier to blame than to face pain, confusion, or disappointment.
But at some point in life, we need to start to look at things differently. That’s the age when we begin to grow beyond blame.
Growing beyond blame doesn’t mean we stop recognising the weight of disappointment or the pain cast upon us by others. It means we quietly carry the burden of the past while we take responsibility for the future.
It means that blame ceases to be a dominant narrative that affects our perception and ambition.
It means we stop internalising the voices that say we are not enough because someone or some people or some situation caused it.
It means we refuse to be defined by our past stories and stop centring ourselves in circles of guilt and accusations.
It means we stop identifying with what went wrong and begin to work on what could go right.
It means letting go of the drama that blames invites and embracing a quieter power of awareness, responsibility, and accountability through intentional actions.
It means breaking through barriers, challenging the roots, and stepping into emotional maturity to rewrite some inherited narratives.
It’s realising that real strength lies in choosing growth over grievance.
Growth is not defined by wasted years but by readiness to take the stage and to understand more than retaliate.
To that child or young adult who keeps blaming people or circumstances, as you keep growing, endeavour to grow past the weight of blame and make space for something better. Choose peace over anger, learning over excuses, and responsibility over guilt. Shift your focus through active transformation. That’s the kind of power that makes a real difference and exactly what you need to grow past blame.
✍️ Amara Ann Unachukwu
