Last year, the Princess of Wales disappeared from public view for some time and a lot of speculations went viral as to what might have gone wrong. What happened to her? Is there something they’re not telling us? Something sinister must be going on, and many wild speculations and conspiracy theory flying all through the media. Soon after, the palace revealed she was being treated for cancer. Sadly, she was reading all the hurtful speculations about her, in her most vulnerable state. The gossip broke her more, as much as the cancer cells.
What is gossip?
Any made-up information or one that’s either totally or partially true is gossip.
The impulse to share unverified information is part of the human condition and we can’t help but engage in it no matter how speculative some may be. Some news cannot go viral without gossip because it is gossip that makes it juicy and makes discretion hard. We want to get to the root of every gossip, how it happened, why it happened, and what happened after. Some go further to find updates as time goes on. We promise to keep every story a secret but it spills because we can’t help but share and we get a buzz from passing it on.
Gossip is a sweet poison. We love to swallow it but it harms us. There’s someone always at the centre of every gossip. There’s a victim who feels the hurt without others knowing.
Gossip is a heartbreak. It destroys a good name and hurts a good spirit. It harms both the gossip and the person who’s gossiped. To the gossip, his integrity is at stake, to the gossiped, his feelings are hurt.
In the present generation, gossip has been finetuned to trend confidently as the truth. Some get coloured, detailed, and embellished as they travel from ear to ear. It gets quickly disseminated by bad families, friends, and society, and has been enabled by social media, causing friendship issues and relational aggression.
Many have lost their peace, integrity, reputation contacts, opportunities, relationships and so much more for the sake of gossip. A lot of the carriers of gossip know little or nothing about the information or person they’re gossiping about, yet they spread it confidently.
Most adults who gossip were gossips as children. They started from the family to the school, to society, spreading toxicity from one end to the other. Many children and young adults enjoy being purveyors of bad news and embarrassing information. They take advantage of the ownership of smartphones in their palms to dish insults and support gossip on many platforms, invading people’s private lives, judging and trolling them from page to page.
Shall we learn to build not tear down, to create not destroy, to support not scatter? Can parents and guardians model the value of treating people with kindness and cultivating a trustworthy reputation? Can they have healthy interactions that reflect their relationship with children? Can they learn to mind their business and teach their children to do the same?
Gossip is the cheapest item to buy and it takes discipline not to price it. He who buys it gets cheapened by its petty values without knowing. It exposes the narrow-minded, the cheap, the ignorant, the gullible, and the dark minds.
Children need to be taught at home and in school to recognize gossip when they see it and navigate healthy alternatives of what to do when they hear it. Most importantly, to avoid being carriers of gossip.
✍️ Amara Ann Unachukwu
