It is natural for parents to be concerned about their children’s future. It is expected for them to do everything within their parental power to see their children live a happy, healthy, successful, and fulfilling life. However, in a bid to achieve this, some parents do this in excess and unknowingly, tilt towards over indulgence, which leads to raising self-indulgent children.
Self-indulgent children are characterized by the unrestrained desires and appetites of their wishes and desires. Their excessive gratification, immoderate, and intemperate desire to have all they want does not only make them selfish but may cause an overall degeneration of respect and self awareness towards others.
There is a culture of self-importance promoted by bad parenting styles and an increase in exposure to social media, violent video games, and films, which are considered the root cause of self-indulgence in children. Yes, self-indulgent children do not emanate overnight. They did not raise themselves. They did not make the TV games they watch or write the TV shows where they watch people showcasing overnight success. Family and society expose them to these ills and leave them unprepared for the realities of life.
There’s a thick line between self care and self-indulgence. Parents should know where to draw the line between these two. A self indulgent child grows up spending excessively on luxurious items, he prioritizes his wants and pleasure over his needs and responsibilities, he constantly seeks support, validation or attention, he is constantly unwillingly to make sacrifices for others, he lacks self discipline and the list goes on. Self care is healthy and harmless, but self-indulgent is selfish and hurtful. A self-indulgent child is excessive, wasteful, intemperate, self gratifying, lavish, and immoderate.
When a child insists on eating whatever he feels like, prefers to sleep, play, or while away time when he should be studying or doing more useful things. When he plays during study time, have excess toys to play with, eats anything at anytime, constantly demands for things he doesn’t need. When he thinks of only what makes him happy and neglects the desire or interest of others, that child is being over indulgent.
Some young people have been stereotyped to believe that it is good to be self-centered to succeed in an increasingly competitive world. This is a half-baked fact because an increased emphasis on self is usually accompanied by a corresponding devaluing of others, and this steps across a line of basic decency and humanity.
True fulfilment comes from self development, not self-indulgence.
“Only those who value self-knowledge over self-satisfaction can achieve wisdom, only those who value self-perfection over “self-fulfilment” can retain dignity, and only those who value self-discipline over self-indulgence can enjoy liberty”….Jakub Bożydar
The roads in the journey of life are rough, long, and filled with potholes. A self-indulgent man craves pleasant things on this road through unrealistic expectations. He chose this at the cost of everything, while the people around him make the sacrifices along the way. Parents, teachers, and society have the responsibility to teach children to discipline their desires, keep their commitments, and restrain their excessiveness.
Amara Ann Unachukwu.
