Decades ago, some human rights activists invested a lot of time, resources, and energy on one course of social development or the other. Some focused on war against indiscipline, some on war against substance abuse, and some on promotion of healthy eating, on good education, and so on.
Agnes Jupitar decided to channel her focus on war against drug intake and trafficking. At this time, drug addiction was destroying numerous lives, as it continues to do. So she spearheaded a campaign that had a simple, snappy, easy to remember title: Just say no. Her message to those tempted by illicit drugs was: just say no. This campaign wasn’t a huge success because vulnerable people needed practical help and support in order to be able to just say no. They needed more than words of slogans or expensive advertising campaigns.
Saying Yes or No is not obedient. Acting it is. We need to live the obedience that we profess. Obedience is beyond the words we speak or the conviction we express. It is the way we transform the world by the kind of lives we live because we are judged by our deeds, not by our words. No doubt, it is easy to talk the talk but harder to walk the walk. Reflect on this, How many promises have you made? and how many were you faithful to?
Obedience means active compliance to an authority figure. This is quite different from passive complaint, the use of the common slogan, ‘to fulfil all righteousness’ which many practice, by compulsion. Psychologists define obedience as a social influence where someone yields to specific orders. It is to act in compliance and willingness.
Unfortunately, society defines obedience in children as raising compliant children. To.many, It means children doing what they are instructed to do, whether it is right or wrong. Beyond compliance, obedience requires children not only to heed but to have the right attitude of politeness in doing so. The ultimate purpose of obedience is for an understanding of the why in obeying and the need for cooperation in obedience. Obviously, we don’t share the same priorities, and if a child is expected to obey his parents, it may be out of compulsion except the child is made to understand the reason behind him obeying.
Empirically, children and youths nowadays have a worrisome distrust of the present sociopolitical procedures, which makes them disobey instructions. It starts from defying the wishes of parents to challenging and revolting their teachers’ instructions. As they grow older and spread their independence wings, they begin to disrupt public order, societal rules, and official policies. This grows from occasional rebellion to a pattern of arguing, confronting, and disobeying their parents, their tutors, and their elders.
When disobedience becomes a pattern, it begins to affect the child and his social and educational life, which in turn affects parents, teachers, and society. This explains why some children and youths are easily angry, resentful, intolerant, have few friends or none at all, are temperamental and irritable, easily upset, very upsetting, and easily blame others.
Disobedience is a contemptuous act against God and man. The bible gives account of many stories and parables about disobedience, the consequences, and the lessons. Much as parents and teachers need to give instructions and set standard for their children, they need to let their children understand the reason behind each directive. They also need to allow independence of mind instead of strict imposition of order. They need to be patient, rational, reasonabe, and subtle in asserting those authorities.
Hopefully, the above strategies will help children feel they belong and be disposed to understand and practice obedience better.
BIBLE VERSE
Isaiah 1:19 – If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land
PROVERB
It is the raised stick that makes the dog obey
Danish Proverb
RIDDLE
I am a stick and wont do anything you want? What stick am I?
Amara Ann Unachukwu
